Your Guardian Angel

So, we've all heard how it is-you meet this one person, the person who could possibly change your life and how you live it forever. You fall in love, everything's fantastic, you get married, and live happily ever after. Right? That's what all the fairytales and Disney movies lead us to believe, anyway. Soon, we all grow up and come to realize that everything we've believed in as children isn't always true. The princes don't just show up when we need them the most. They're not always going to rescue us in our darkest hour. They might get lost somewhere along the way. Princes are hard to come by these days, let alone a decent guy. There are so many guys out there-athletes, musicians, skaters, surfers, nerds, geeks, you name 'em, they make 'em. It almost seems as if there's a perfect guy for everyone. However, not all of these guys, as awesome as they may seem, are good ones. There are some who are complete jerks, others who just want one thing, and still others with hearts that have been mutilated just as much as some of ours. We might think that these guys-the jerks and the broken ones-all need fixing. That's not always true. They don't need to be fixed; they just need someone to be there. Maybe there's a legit reason they act like they do. We all have our moments where we know we're not acting as we should, but we do it anyway to get attention. Not only are we seeking attention from these boys, we're seeking love and affection, too. Most of us, okay, admit it, all of us, want to find that one perfect guy who's going to love us no matter what. So, what if we do find this one person? The one who makes us the happiest when we're with them. The one who's always on our mind, no matter what. The one we want to be with all the time. Are you thinking of someone? I am. For a long time, I stopped believing in fairytales. I never thought Prince Charming would show his face if I was around. However, I think I might have found him. We met years ago in elementary school, lost contact, but became friends again during my senior year of high school. We dated over the summer, and I really fell for him. There was a catch, though. I was unaware at the time, but his heart had been completely mutilated and destroyed by girls before me. And, although we both wanted it to work out, we ended our relationship during my second month as a college freshman. I was crushed, of course, but I quickly got over it; or so I thought. I began seeing another guy, but soon realized that he wasn't what I wanted at all. All I could think about was the guy I loved. No matter how hard I tried to force myself to stop thinking about him, he always found a way to get back into my head. Little things began reminding me of him and of what we had. He started texting me and I realized how much I really missed him. The more we talked, the more sure I became that this guy might possibly be the one. We finally got to see each other in October and I felt the same as I always had toward him. We began seeing each other more and more and the first day he kissed me again, I almost melted. Cheesy, I know, but hey, when you love someone, you know it. I recently found out, however, the reasoning behind all the madness and heartbreak. He'd been hurt a couple of times before and was afraid that the same thing would happen with me. What he didn't realize, though, is that I'm a lot different than those other two girls. I could never hurt him the way they did. He doesn't see that, though. Well, not yet, anyway. He says nobody has stuck by him, but I'm going to show him that I will, no matter what. So, now, it's my job to keep him sane and show him that there are people out there, aka me, who will be by his side and love him no matter what.

A Tissue For Your Issues

So, I decided that I really happen to like this whole blogging thing and that I'm going to continue it. I've also realized that there are a lot of people in the world and they have a lot of issues. These issues come from just about anything-school, parents, friends, and even from yourself. I know I have my own issues and that's a lot to handle; especially when some of these issues are personal problems that can't always be resolved by other people. Sometimes it seems like we're all alone with our problems and there's no way out or nobody there to help us. However, I've found that the small things shouldn't really matter. I mean, sure, at first it may seem like the end of the world, but soon you'll find that they're only speed bumps along the way. Although some things can be brushed aside, there are other things in life that make it a little more complicated and painful. People get sick, hearts get broken, you don't like what you see in the mirror, or people just aren't who you thought they were. We all start to lose faith in times like these, but when this happens, we have to remember that God will bring us through it. At times, prayer is the most powerful thing we have and sometimes, it just doesn't feel like enough. We long to help those in need, but it seems like there's nothing we can do about it. It doesn't seem like handing our problems over to God will do anything for us because we still constantly worry about everything. We're only human, and worrying is in our nature; however, with faith come answers. Maybe they're not the answers we're looking for all the time, but it's easier to cope with the answers and know that things won't change instead of fretting and worrying about any possible outcomes. Even though it doesn't always seem like a lot, prayer is sometimes the most powerful and helpful thing we can offer. After all, if He brings you to it, He'll bring you through it.

The Word, The Dream, and The Becoming

Two of the most amazing girls I've ever met

My parents; without them, I'd be nothing.

     So, as the first semester of my college experience comes quickly to a close, I've realized that I indeed have changed since I first came to Converse. My hometown is a very small one that hardly has anything. I mean, we have things, like buildings and such, but there's really nothing to do...well, unless you enjoy eating a lot. Nobody knows where the town of Loris is and the most exciting thing to ever happen was about five or six years ago when McDonald's was built. Yes, it's that sad. My hometown had one thing that I wouldn't trade for the world, though, and that one thing was Southside Dance Center. It was at Southside that I was first introduced to the stage and the world of performing. I've been dancing for fourteen years now, and it's really something I love. I think this is where my love of being on stage first began. After I realized that the stage is one of the places in which I feel most comfortable, I also realized that I want to spend the rest of my life performing. Everything about the stage was spellbinding to me-the music, the dancing, the costumes, the sets-absolutely everything. Although I was completely comfortable performing on stage in front of people, my confidence didn't usually show up in person. Throughout high school all I wanted was to fit in so I could make friends. Since I attended a private school, you might think that not almost everybody would drive trucks and wear camouflage. Well, you'd be wrong. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with that, however, it's really not my style. At all. Anyway, try as I might, I was always a little different than most students. I wasn't up to date on the Top 40 Hits of the week and was usually the last to hear anything. I listened to music most other students didn't care for and knew about dance and theatre. I had dreams to move to New York and become a star, not just take over the family business. Thankfully, I met a couple of friends who didn't have the whole "country" state of mind, either. One has been an amazing friend of mine since first grade and the other has been with me since about freshman year. These two girls, my family, and my church family were the ones who encouraged me and really pushed me to go for my dreams.

A bit of the wonderful insanity that occurs at college.

I'm no longer afraid to act completely insane!

     Even though I have this amazing support system, I still doubt myself sometimes. There was a time in the recent past where I didn't believe in myself. I know that confidence in yourself is the biggest key to success, but sometimes it's a really difficult situation. I felt like New York was just a dream that couldn't be reached. It seemed like such a long shot for a small-town girl to make it in such a big city. I felt like I was almost alone in my dreaming. It wasn't that I felt no one believed in me, it was just that I had almost no faith in myself. However, I soon realized that there was a place where I could be myself and could become successful. What is this place, you may ask? Converse, of course! When I first came to Converse, I wasn't really sure of what to expect. I'd heard great things about college, but still wasn't sure how to make a smooth transition from living a life in a place where I was so different than everyone else to a place where I belonged and there were people who had interests similar to mine. I realized that I didn't have to hide who I am from the people here. They are all completely accepting of other people as individuals! With this in mind, I re-gained my self-confidence and realized that Converse really is a place that will help you follow your dreams, no matter how big. With my confidence restored, I plan on continuing my intended plan of moving to New York and performing on Broadway, and nothing is going to stand in my way.

Tradition has to start somewhere!

     So, like many other schools, Converse is one with a lot of traditions. Some traditions are almost as old as Converse itself and others are rather new. Traditions are celebrations of a certain thing we all have in common. Along with being Converse students, which is celebrated during 1889 week, and pink panthers, which is celebrated during Big Sis/Little Sis week, Converse girls have another thing in common. We all suffer from stress. No matter if we're music students, biology majors, political science majors, or theatre majors, our work can sometimes get the best of us and can seem endless. In order to reduce the insane amount of stress, I think a new tradition should be established. I find music to be an excellent stress reliever, so I think a whole weekend devoted to music would be amazing. The students could compile song lists and vote on submissions. The songs chosen could be played through speakers outside on the quad. Students could stay outside for the weekend, weather permitting, and sleep under the stars. I suppose you could say it's a little like Woodstock minus the hippies! :)

"Give back my heart tonight. I'm sick of never smiling 'cause you're so uptight!"

     So, as a music student, stress is everywhere. There are projects due, songs to practice, homework, not to mention MacGamut! With so many things running through my head, the only thing that helps me calm down and regain my focus is...more music!
     One of my most favorite bands to listen to when I feel overwhelmed and completely lost is Playjerise. Their music just gives me a sense of peace and calmness that I find hard to reach with so much going on at one time. This Australian band is just totally amazing. One of my favorite songs by them is "Ocean Of Mine". It reminds me that not everything should or will come easily. Here's the acoustic version!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2CKx3MCdn8k
     Another band that I use to take comfort in is Right Away, Great Captain! Like Dr. Vaneman said, we all like to wallow a bit in our sorrow and stress. Well, at least I know I do. This band's music has sort of a melancholy sound to it, but I thoroughly enjoy every bit. My favorite by this band is "Right Ahead, Young Sailor". It's short and sweet, but definitely gets the point across. If you click the link, you'll see what it sounds like...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omDQWh1iFi8&feature=related
     My final "go-to" music comes from a lovely lady by the name of Sara Bareilles. I find her music extremely wonderful and fascinating. Some of her pieces are upbeat and cheerful, while others are more serious. I think I can find a song by this amazing artist to fit almost every one of my many insane moods. Currently, my favorite of hers is a piece she wrote called "Gravity". I think this song is absolutely gorgeous. It's just...well, you just have to hear for yourself!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEXhAMtbaec&ob=av2n
     My music taste changes with the weather and my mood, so these three songs are just a few of what have been getting me through these past couple of months. On any other given day, you can catch me listening to just about anything from John Mayer to The Beatles to Vampire Weekend (yes, Dr. Vaneman, I love them, too!) I'll give just about anything a chance, so if you want me to listen to anything or have any suggestions, just let me know. There's nothing I love more than new music. :)

alcohol, alcohol everywhere and not a coke to drink

     As we get older, we're exposed to more and more things that are considered taboo when we're younger, such as drugs, language, and alcohol. There have been questions raised about a possibility of lowering the legal drinking age to eighteen. Many people believe that the drinking age should remain at twenty one, however, I think it should be lowered to eighteen. It seems to me that eighteen year olds have every right guaranteed to legal adults with the exception of drinking. Face it, at age eighteen, we're allowed to join the army, purchase cigarettes, go to clubs, play the lottery, and even get married. All of these new given freedoms come with responsibilities, just like drinking does. If we're considered responsible enough to vote for the leaders of our country and fight for our freedom, we should also be considered responsible enough to partake in drinking. Since drinking is outlawed to those under the age of twenty one, more and more teenagers are illegally possessing and drinking alcohol. Maybe, if the legal drinking age is lowered to eighteen, fewer and fewer teenagers will resort to secretly divulging in alcohol. By legally obtaining alcohol and drinking it responsibly, eighteen year olds would be experiencing the same treatment as those of legal drinking age. Because some teenagers drink illegally, they are considered irresponsible. However, many people who are of legal drinking age drink irresponsibly. This only goes to show that it doesn't depend on the age of the person, only their own self-control and responsibility.

a flamingo in a flock of pigeons?

All throughout my high school years I was considered one of the "strange ones". You know the type: the girl that nobody really wants to hang out with because she's so different than everybody else. In this case, "different" at Pee Dee Academy meant you didn't hunt, never owned camo, and randomly burst out in song. Because I was looked at in this way, I was terribly nervous about starting college. What if I can't make any friends? How hard will the classes be? These are just two of the many questions that ran through my mind on the long drive up to Spartanburg. However, as soon as I stepped on campus I immediately felt at home. Everyone I met was so welcoming and helpful. I realized that there really wasn't anything to be afraid of. This shows that, in reality, every other freshman is just as nervous as I was. I soon found out that there are actually other people in the world who enjoy the same things I do, and that definitely made me even more comfortable in my new home. Another thing to remember about the wonderful world of college is that it's perfectly fine to ask for help if you need it. Understanding the basics behind all subjects is the key to success and good grades. It's especially helpful if you have friends in your classes who understand what is going on because I find it a lot less intimidating asking them for help. Yet another thing to be learned about college is that you will get tired of the food in Gee. They have good food, yes; however, after a while, you'll notice that it gets repetitive very quickly. If you find this to be true, there are many tasty off-campus restaurants that offer tasty food for cheap. This last tidbit of information could be the most helpful of all: time management. Time management is a very, very, very helpful thing, trust me. During the first few weeks of school I didn't have a set schedule for anything and found myself extremely stressed because I had so much to do. However, after making a schedule and forcing myself to follow it, I found that it was a lot easier to get everything done. Because I had all of my schoolwork done I had time to spend with friends. This brings us full circle-don't be afraid to be yourself at college! I guarantee there's someone just like you. So, let's review what we've learned, shall we? Number one: don't be afraid of what others will think about you; they feel the same way about you! Number two: food in Gee is good, but good food can also easily be found off-campus for less cash. Number three, and most importantly: time management. You will have time for everything. You just have to make good decisions on what you spend your time doing!

So Much To Do, So Little Time!

     Let's face it-distractions are everywhere. They come in many different forms; text messages, phone calls, Facebook, social events, the list goes on. With all of these wonderful options of entertainment, we find ourselves slowly drifting away from what we really should be doing. My biggest problem with time management begins with getting distracted by all of the fun activities and programs that Converse has to offer. There's theatre, dance, music, and hanging out with friends; not to mention all of the things to do outside of school, like exploring downtown Spartanburg, taking trips to Greenville, going to concerts, and just finding excuses to get off of campus. All of these things are great, up to a point. However, by declaring a music major, a lot of time has to be committed to practice, studying, and, of course, attending class. At times, I get frustrated with homework or practicing and think, "Oh, I'll just finish it later" and my work never gets done. That leaves me feeling unprepared and nervous about classes or performances. Procrastination and frustration are two major things that affect my time management skills. Over the years, I have come to realize that procrastination has another form. This is commonly known as Facebook. Yes, I, like most everybody else in the whole entire world, can very easily get distracted by being able to reconnect with old friends with the click of a button. It seems that every time I get on my laptop, I somehow end up on Facebook. Alas, this is a bad habit that should be broken. All in all, time management is the key to being successful in college. However, if you're as easily distracted as I am, it takes commitment and dedication to get your work done before going out and having fun. With that said, I'll go and finish my Theory homework! :)

This Thing Called College

     Okay, so I'm Mary Frances and am a freshman at Converse College. Being eighteen, I don't know too much about college, the world, or even life itself; there's a lot I have to learn. That's one of the reasons I decided to go to college. Sure, just going out into the world quickly after graduation is a great way to make money, but that's just not me. I want to study more and prepare myself for what the world has to offer.
     Ever since I was a little girl I loved music. My mom used to tell people that I was singing before I could talk. I remember making up words to hymns because I couldn't read them and thinking that the songs we sang in church were the most beautiful things I had ever heard. As I got older, music began to play an even more important role in my life. I continued singing and began taking dance lessons. Now, you might ask, "Why is she giving me her life story? This isn't relevant...", but I promise it all makes sense. With dance, comes music. I think that listening to the music and really making a connection with the movement and the music is extremely important. I mean, you don't want to dance to something that doesn't make you feel anything because that's just boring. In this way, I was completely surrounded by music; it was everywhere! I began to develop a true love for music and performing. My love for this encouraged me to want to pursue a career in performing arts. As I began to think about how to go about achieving this career, many options presented themselves. I could've left home after high school graduation and moved to New York in pursue of my dreams or worked and lived at home for a year. However, I thought I might need a little (okay, a lot) more help and studying if I wanted to perform on Broadway one day. With this thought in my head, I began to apply to colleges to see how they could help me on my journey.
     Hopefully, that answered the question of why I chose to go to college. Now, I'll answer the second one: why did you choose Converse? Well, there's a story to this answer as well. Since I had decided to go to college, I had to find the right school. I began with thinking of attending Columbia College because that's where my mother went to college. She had also taken me around campus a few times and I like it enough. I also toured Lander University, Furman University, Wofford College, Coker College, Winthrop University, and Coastal Carolina University. Although I really loved Columbia College, I didn't feel exactly right. For a while I struggled between going to Lander University and Wofford College because I was considering a communications major. One day, my mom came to me and told me I would be touring Converse College. My first reaction was one of surprise and refusal. Why would I want to go to some random school that I thought, at the time, was named after a shoe?! No way was I going to go there; I already had my heart set on Wofford. I was miserable the whole drive up to Spartanburg. Sitting in denial in a car for about four hours is not a pleasant experience. However, as soon as I set foot on campus, I fell in love with Converse. The first thing I said was, "Woah, this is like an all-girl's version of Wofford!" Needless to say, my mother looked at me like I was an idiot. After touring Converse, I thought about my options but realized that no other college seemed as right as Converse felt. When I'm on campus, I feel like I'm somewhere I belong. It's everything I've ever dreamed college would be.
     On to the next question; why did I decide to study music at Converse? Well, as I mentioned earlier, music is pretty much my life. I'm not one of those people who want the career that will make them the most money. I want to have a job doing something I love. I love music, therefore, I'm here to study it! Plus, Converse has an amazing music program. We're one of the only schools to have our own independent music school. I also really loved the fact that Converse music students were all very successful in their chosen professions.
     As for the last question, I'd definitely give up cereal. I'm a really picky eater, so I don't eat my cereal with milk. I just like it dry. I really love sandwiches. They're easy to make and have a little of almost every food group in them! Sandwiches are wonderful if you're really in a hurry or just want a quick snack. There's nothing quite like a turkey and provolone sandwich! :)